Why Should I Consider Forgiveness?

Why Should I Consider Forgiveness?

Forgiveness isn’t a word often used these days. And when it is, the pain we feel from the trauma or betrayal goes too deep to even consider. Yet, I’ve learned that stuffing doesn’t fix anything.

I’ve learned from experience that stuffing is not equal to healing. Eventually the stuffing begins to ooze out all over the place, much like that suitcase I filled too full.  As my suitcase is jostled and dropped, it eventually busts wide open to expose everything I wanted to stay hidden.

BEFORE I BEGIN

I’m not a professional, and I understand that healing from trauma and betrayal may require time and professional help before forgiveness is possible. With that, I have experienced the internal peace that comes with forgiveness.

Also, if you currently live in trauma without safety, I pray that God would move on your behalf so you may see his care for you and experience his power at work on your behalf. Please don’t stay there once you see the way out!

I also pray that God grant you someone to help you navigate the pain you’ve endured so that you can begin to heal. If you have sought help and have had little relief, there are many stories of people whom God has healed from PTSD.

I too have experienced his healing from PTSD over time and have shared pieces of my story in other posts. Because of my own need in the last year to heal and make choices regarding forgiveness, I have done a lot of soul-searching and some study on forgiveness–what it is and what it isn’t. I have become greatly aware that to find healing eventually requires the choice to forgive. But first let me clarify what I mean by forgiveness.

As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn't leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I'd still be in prison. Quote by Nelson Mandela

FORGIVENESS

  • Never justifies the perpetrator or what they’ve done. God saw it all and promises he himself to take vengeance.
  • Never eliminates the need for restitution.
  • Never means you need to stay with or return to the perpetrator so they can continue to abuse. Safety is never ignored by true forgiveness. (Church leaders should NEVER advise anyone to stay with an abusive spouse or parent in order “to submit and forgive”.)
  • Doesn’t assume a time-frame. (If the events caused deep emotional wounds or trauma, you may need outside help to process the events and your emotions/trauma to be able to forgive.)

FORGIVENESS ALWAYS ASSUMES

  • The perpetrator doesn’t deserve forgiveness.
  • The choice to forgive is for the benefit of one emotionally wounded or traumatized to find inner peace and healing.
  • “I refuse from this time forward to be emotionally enslaved to the one who traumatized me.” (Refusal to forgive keeps the traumatized emotionally chained to the perpetrator and events that traumatized.)

Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a constant attitude. quote by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr

SCIENTIFIC STUDIES ON THE POWER OF FORGIVENESS

As I researched for this article, I found many quotes both for and against forgiving those who’ve deeply wounded you. I also read about overwhelming scientific evidence (abstract by NIH, Harvard Medical School, Johns Hopkins Medical School) that suggests that the choice to forgive benefits the forgiver.

Practicing forgiveness can have powerful health benefits. Observational studies, and even some randomized trials, suggest that forgiveness is associated with lower levels of depression, anxiety, and hostility; reduced substance abuse; higher self-esteem; and greater life satisfaction. Yet, forgiving people is not always easy. From “The Power of Forgiveness” February 12, 2021, Harvard Health Publishing, Harvard Medical School

STORIES OF EXTREME FORGIVENESS

10 Inspiring Stories of Extreme Forgiveness That Will Lift Your Spirits

Faith Gateway article from the book by Eric Metaxas, “7 Women and the Secrets of Their Greatness” entitled, “The Test Of Forgiveness.” The article is about Corrie ten Boom, an Austrian Holocaust Survivor whose family harbored Jews in their home before being caught and sent to the Ravensbrück concentration camp.

NPR News article: “‘It’s For You To Know That You Forgive,’ Says Holocaust Survivor” about Eva Kor, founder of the CANDLES (Children of Auschwitz Nazi Deadly Lab Experiments Survivors) Holocaust Museum and Education Center in Terre Haute, Ind.

"My forgiveness ... has nothing to do with the perpetrator, has nothing to do with any religion, it is my act of self-healing, self-liberation and self-empowerment," she says. "I had no power over my life up to the time that I discovered that I could forgive, and I still do not understand why people think it's wrong." Evan Kor, Auschwitz survivor

WHAT IF I’M NOT YET ABLE TO FORGIVE

Maybe you’re thinking one of these scenarios right now:

  • “But I can’t forgive.”
  • “I’m still suffering from what they did to me.”
  • “What they did was too horrific to be forgiven.”
  • “They still don’t care about what they did to me.”
  • “But you have no idea what you’re asking me to do.”

To say I understand would be cruel. I can’t even list all I’ve faced and use my life’s experiences as reason for me to sit here and tell you I understand.

Yet, as I contemplate the events of my own life and the pain I’ve experienced even the last year, I’m realizing forgiveness plays a huge role in my ability to experience lasting inner peace and healing.

Please don’t throw out the idea of forgiveness without taking time to consider what you have read here. Forgiveness is meant for you to flourish.

BUT WHAT IF I’M THE ONE WHO NEEDS FORGIVENESS?

You aren’t alone. Every one of us, including me, have been in this place of needing forgiveness. That’s why God’s Word states that:

Christ suffered and died for sins once and for all–the innocent for the guilty–to bring you near to God by his body being put to death and by being raised to life by the Spirit. 1 Peter 3:18 TPT

How to Forgive Yourself Even When It Seems Impossible, Real Simple magazine article by Sara Gaynes Levy and Ria Bhagwat, updated May 22, 2025

God is the one we truly need the most forgiveness from. Yet, in Christ Jesus, he never refuses to forgive anyone who seeks him and his forgiveness. He is so gracious. Yet, as you seek his forgiveness, you need to know that he then requires you to offer others what you have received from him.

A PERSONAL STORY OF EXTRAVAGANT FORGIVENESS

I sat in the congregation while praise music blared as one-by-one young and old testified of their new life in Christ through baptism in the pool set up at the front of the church. Suddenly I noticed a middle-aged man I knew enter the pool followed by a young man whom the older man was readying to baptise. I had heard the story of how the older and younger had met and sat with tears streaming down my face as I witnessed extravagant love.

The older man and his wife had lost their son several years before to a drunk driver. They decided that rather than live in rage at what had happened, they would choose to forgive. Not only that, they decided they wanted to meet this young man who had squandered their son’s precious life through a moment of sheer stupidity and self-indulgence. They were granted permission to meet their son’s murderer, and share their hearts to forgive. They spent time with this young man over the next several years. Moved by their love, the young man decided to give his life to Christ. This particular morning, as both father and murderer stood together in the baptismal pool, a new family was born and hundreds got to witness extravagant love. Love like Jesus.

WHAT IF THE ONE YOU NEED TO FORGIVE IS GOD?

Talk to him about it. He’s seen your heart all along and would want you to dialogue with him about it. It won’t hurt, and could help. Also, if you’ve been wounded by someone who identified themselves with God, they aren’t God. There are plenty of people who misrepresent him every day. Talk to God about them as well. God longs for you to find restoration with him through Jesus.

STRUGGLING WITH THE PAIN OF FORGIVING

Corrie ten Boom was an Austrian Christian who’s family hid Jews during the Pogroms in Austria. Her father and sister died in concentration camps, and she survived Ravensbruck. This is her story of struggle:

BIBLE BITES REGARDING FORGIVENESS

“Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy.” —Micah 7:18

“If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” —2 Chronicles 7:14

“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” —Ephesians 4:32

I think that if God forgives us we must forgive ourselves. Otherwise, it is almost like setting up ourselves as a higher tribunal than Him. CS Lewis

MAY I PRAY FOR YOU?

Father, I know what it’s like to hurt so badly that the thought of forgiveness makes me feel like throwing up. Yet, I’ve also felt the freedom of finally choosing to forgive. Would you please comfort this one who now struggles? Would you reveal your heart toward them and what they’ve been through? Would you come now and intervene on their behalf to help them do what they cannot on their own? Thank you, in Jesus’ name, amen.

Does Anxiety Need to Batter My Life Forever?

Does Anxiety Need to Batter My Life Forever?

Anxiety. That sense of electricity uncontrollably coursing through my body. Feeling like I want to crawl out of my skin but can’t. Agitation I can’t walk away from. It’s tormenting.

In 2007, as I faced my husband’s impending death, anxiety struck the first time like lightning. The storm lasted six to eight years, striking multiple times daily, every day like poor Ned Ryreson reliving Ground Hog Day. It took time to understand what in the world I was experiencing, and that I wasn’t going mad. It also took a lot of time for God to instruct me how to harness anxiety and restore peace.

It’s been a while since I have dealt with anxiety like I did in those days. I’ve experienced small squalls since, but within the last several months, anxiety has tried to batter me once again to where I’ve wanted to crawl under a rock and escape. Once again faithful God is teaching me how to subjugate this beast and restore peace. Since we all have moments when anxiety and fear rage, allow me to share with you pieces of my journey and my transformations to peace.

I’m not a professional but do know anxiety

I have a lot of experience with anxiety over many years, and it is from that pool of experience that I write and remind myself of how far I’ve come.

As I researched this post, I learned of Dr. Caroline Leaf, a Neuroscientist who has spent her career studying the plasticity of the brain. She states that anxiety and its associated emotions aren’t meant to be accepted as “normal” forever, but to be tools to expose areas of our lives needing assistance so we can live healthy lives.

Storm overhead with a ceiling of very dark, foreboding clouds and what appears to be a small funnel over the freeway.

“Your brain cannot change until you accept the anxiety or depression as a signal giving you information on its cause, or origin, and in this way you make the anxiety or depression work for you and not against you.”
― Caroline Leaf, Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess: 5 Simple, Scientifically Proven Steps to Reduce Anxiety, Stress, and Toxic Thinking

Social media and chronic anxiety – warning

Our culture is obsessed with Social and digital media as we crave greater amounts of information. Yet, with all we allow ourselves to take in daily, both pleasant and stressing, society in general is beginning to show signs that something is wrong.

“The use of social networks is strongly correlated with the development of anxiety and other psychological problems such as depression, insomnia, stress, decreased subjective happiness, and a sense of mental deprivation.”

NIH National Library of Medicine, Link Between Excessive Social Media Use and Psychiatric Disorders, 03/27/2023 

Stanford Law School, A 2023 US Surgeon General’s Advisory Report, NIH National Library of Medicine, and a myriad of other news articles and universities all warn of the critical dangers regarding how much time we spend on social and digital media. UC Davis Health gives a myriad of reasons why, and include safe tips for usage, which strongly suggest in-person contact over online contact, and greatly limiting online scrolling.

Neuroscience and anxiety – hope for healing

Neuroscientists are learning that unbridled negative emotions/circumstances and their corresponding thought patterns build toxic pathways in our brains much like deformed roots and branches of a tree. In addition, they are also learning that we can retrain our brains to shut off the spiraling thought patterns that help produce chronic anxiety and depression.

There is hope because our brains can be retrained.

We all have choices, and can choose patterns that avoid or heal chronic anxiety. Who and what I listen to is critical for my mental health and for retraining my brain toward more healthy pathways. If the majority of my intake only encourages and affirms my anxiety, depression, and negativity, I’m feeding myself poison.

I was recently told that someone, whom I love deeply, realized that much of her anxiety was caused by what and who she listened to, and that once she stopped all the toxins coming in, she began to see life with greater positivity. Several of the above reports suggested limiting social and digital media usage in order to improve mental health.

Storm coming in, Texas. Wall cloud angled, and dark blue sky.

After my first husband’s death in 2008, what I listened to helped to decrease grief and anxiety

  • Instead of listening to music that “understood” and “affirmed” my grief and anxiety, I chose music that reminded me that I was understood and upheld by the God who made and loved me, that I didn’t walk alone, and that God had good plans for my future. Rather than becoming further depressed, the music improved my mental health. I’ve heard many testimonies from others who also chose to listen to Christian music for 30 days, and that it changed their outlook on life. KLOVE is an excellent starting point.
  • I made time to sit with my pain and acknowledge the loss with Jesus as my companion, rather than allow anxiety and grief to spiral over and over in my head. I listened to Jesus’ voice and comfort over focusing on the grief, anxiety, and loss I felt. The space I made to grieve allowed me to heal sooner, and offered me greater peace as I navigated this new season of life.
  • I surrounded myself with people who could offer hope and instruction as to how to navigate this new stage of life. I attended a local GriefShare group that surrounded me with people who understood. The accompanied grief training also taught me that my grief experiences were normal, and helped me navigate this new life with greater peace. Both the people and training equipped me to understand my grief so I could heal, offering less space for anxious thoughts to take precedence. GriefShare has chapters throughout the US and also has a web presence if you live outside the US.

After remarrying in 2012, a trauma counselor helped tremendously with anxiety

My newly blended family struggled with the traumatic loss of their former wife and mom two years before. Also, I was now the third mom to not only my adopted son, but now two step-sons who had also been adopted. Life wasn’t easy for any of us as we navigated to blend our family. in addition, I continued to deal with the anxiety associated with my first husband’s death. Pain clashed with pain and sometimes triggered old wounds and created new ones.

I finally realized I needed assistance to work through the trauma, and so my pastor recommended a Christian trauma counselor. She affirmed the trauma by acknowledging that I wasn’t exaggerating the struggles. She also spoke truth, hope, and life into our situation, and gave me sound advice as to how to express my heart, needs, and emotions so my husband could better understand. This time with her gave me tools, hope, and a healthier way forward, and broke down opportunities for anxiety to continue to rule.

After about four years of marriage, things began to calm down significantly, and I had healed enough that the anxiety no longer had a hold on me. I was grateful for the morning I awoke, and anxiety wasn’t the first emotion I experienced. I was finally beginning to feel safe.

During COVID we invented new practices to guard against anxiety

Covid, for the most part, is behind us. Yet the effects are still among us. What I learned from that time still affects what and who I listen to today.

  • I cut off most of the news and social media as it was having a negative impact on my mental health. I still hold to this practice. My life is much more fruitful because I don’t spend hours listening to and reading about things I have no control over. So when I interact with the pain of others within my world, I have a greater pool of energy and compassion to give. My impact is increased because I’ve not given my emotional energy to things outside my sphere of influence.
  • My husband and I began a practice then that we still hold to today – we often spend time near the end of the day listening to and singing contemplative worship and praise music that lifts our eyes from the events of this world to God’s realm among us. It calms and soothes me from the effects of daily life, and often eases any anxiety that I may be facing with his peace.

photo: mountain passage, raining

The role the Bible plays in my mental health

Reading my Bible daily is critical to my mental health. Below are some helpful steps to begin and maintain a reading plan:

  • Pray for God to reveal his love for me
  • Don’t begin with Genesis or Matthew
  • Good starting places – the Psalms (reveals God’s understanding and compassion) and the gospel of John (reveals God’s love and power through Jesus)
  • Read a newer translation such as the NIV or NLT. King James was a wonderful translation for its time, but the archaic language makes it difficult to understand today
  • Read until something about God’s love, or a positive course change sticks out to you. That may be God speaking to your heart
  • Respond to what you read – Pause, consider, record what you recieved, and talk to God about it

A taste from God’s Word

The Bible simply speaks to the wisdom of guarding what I allow into my mind, and the positive benefit of doing so:

…whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. Philippians 4:8-9 (NLT)

A Prayer of Hope

Lord, you have brought great healing into my mind, body, and spirit, so I ask you to do the same for this dear one. Your love for them surpasses knowledge. May you grant them the trust they need to reach out to you. In Jesus’ name, amen.

A Song of Hope

 

My Guilt Is Killing Me

My Guilt Is Killing Me

 

Guilt. We all deal with it and have since the first humans experienced overpowering guilt and shame several millennia ago.

Made Guiltless www.soulcries.org

WHAT INTRODUCED GUILT AND SHAME INTO OUR STORY?

Created Guiltless

In Genesis one and two we read that God created all things by speaking them into existence. Yet it adds that he uniquely formed the first man with his own hands out of the dust of the ground, and then breathed his very life into him. He later fashioned the first woman from the man’s rib. The Bible also says God created them in his very image and likeness. He then gave all humanity, including you and me the mandate to rule and care for this earth as he would, as his co-regents. Identity, relationship, purpose, and fulfillment. Guiltless.

God declared them and us the pinnacle of his creation.

The garden he place them in was beautiful beyond imagination and included everything they would need and everything that was was good and pleasing. Here they experienced God’s very best – safety, peace, and gladness, with a life free from danger, fear, anxiety, sorrow, grief, pain, guilt, and shame. God joined them in the garden and spent precious time with them.

Within this beautiful garden God planted a tree called “The Knowledge of Good and Evil” and allowed access for a serpent. Both were harmless if left alone, but were in the garden to offer the man and woman the freedom to choose or reject God (no robots). God gave them one rule out of all the “yes’s” he offered, along with his explicit instructions to never eat from that tree. If they did, they would die.

Guilt introduced

In Genesis three we read that one day as the woman walked in the garden, the serpent came along and pointed out that tree and inferred that she and her husband Adam were missing out, and that one tree would enlighten them to all their Creator had withheld.

Adam and Eve already enjoyed God’s every good gift and safety, so the only thing that tree could offer was the knowledge of evil, which was the serpent’s specialty. In the original language, “evil” implies not only the construct of evil but everything that goes with it. Pain, suffering, hopelessness, guilt, shame, broken bodies, broken minds, foreign reasoning, all leading to a broken world. But this couple had never experienced such things, and so the serpent knew his only opportunity to gain their allegiance was to cause them to doubt God’s goodness, long for what they didn’t understand, and entice them to taste the pleasures evil offered. The serpent still counts on our naivety.

The Bible states that the woman believed the serpent and enticed her husband to also eat from the fruit. Immediately their eyes were opened to evil and they realized they were naked. Evil twisted what had been good, destroyed their innocence, and repictured view of themselves, their relationship with their Creator and one another. They sewed fig leaves to cover their guilt and shame and then hid from the only one who could help them.

Nothing has changed, has it?

Psalm 51:1-3 NLT

MERCY FOR GUILT

God found the man and woman hiding and called them to himself. He questioned them, they blamed everything but themselves, and eventually confessed. He told them what they would have to face because of their choice, yet in hope also declared that one day he would send a Redeemer who would make all things right. This Redeemer would also destroy the serpent who had deceived them. God didn’t abandon them to their guilt.

1 John 1:9 NLT

GOD COVERED THEIR GUILT AND SHAME

If you read Genesis 3:21, you’ll notice that God didn’t do what most of us would do. After confronting them and offering hope, he removed their attempt to cover their guilt and shame, and clothed them. God killed an animal he had created for good things, took its skin, and covered his children. This was the first sacrifice to pay for sin. His love for his children was immense. It still is.

John 3:16-17 NLT www.soulcries.org

WHO IS THIS REDEEMER PROMISED TO RID US OF OUR GUILT?

There is a prophesy in Isaiah 53:2-6 in the Old Testament that beautifully describes this Redeemer and how he would rid you and me from guilt.

The servant grew up before God—a scrawny seedling,
a scrubby plant in a parched field.
There was nothing attractive about him,
nothing to cause us to take a second look.
He was looked down on and passed over,
a man who suffered, who knew pain firsthand.
One look at him and people turned away.
We looked down on him, thought he was scum.
But the fact is, it was our pains he carried—
our disfigurements, all the things wrong with us.
We thought he brought it on himself,
that God was punishing him for his own failures.
But it was our sins that did that to him,
that ripped and tore and crushed him—our sins!
He took the punishment, and that made us whole.
Through his bruises we get healed.
We’re all like sheep who’ve wandered off and gotten lost.
We’ve all done our own thing, gone our own way.
And God has piled all our sins, everything we’ve done wrong,
on him, on him. (MSG)

Titus 3:4-6 Guiltless www.soulcries.org

JESUS OFFERS US AN EXCHANGE FROM GUILT TO GUILTLESS

Kindness, mercy, and grace isn’t what we expect, is it? We assume judgement and condemnation because that is what we deserve. But God’s love is so great and his compassion so tender toward you and me that his heart would always rather offer to redeem us rather than condemn us in our guilt.

Our Creator sent his Son to do for us what we can’t do for ourselves. Jesus became a man yet remained fully God, lived guiltlessly before God, and chose to pay for our guilt by sacrificing himself on our behalf. His payment:

  • Cleanses us from our guilt and shame
  • Breathes his Spirit within us
  • Makes us brand new creatures in Jesus
  • Destroys the hold of sin and death that was killing us

His Spirit within us makes the exchange from death to life, darkness to light, evil to restored good (God’s righteousness) in a split second when we choose to entrust ourselves to this Redeemer and his offer of new life. Yet change also happens over time as we yield to his work within us. We never have to grunt out change. We only yield to his gentle voice and direction as he makes the changes within us. Not religious zeal, but contented restoration of guiltless relationship.

Today, he’s offering you this exchange. Your guilt for his righteousness. Living in God’s rightness takes us back to the place where we can experience the same goodness and guiltlessness that Adam and Eve left behind when they rebelled. The same peace, gladness, safety, hope, and freedom from guilt and shame that killed us inside.

That’s his gift to you, but you must be willing to receive both him and his gift. It’s your choice.

Romans 8:1-2 TLB Guiltless www.soulcries.org

If you ask Jesus to make this exchange, he promises that you will no longer live in condemnation. Guiltless. Read that verse in Romans again. New creations in Jesus Christ don’t have to get bogged down any longer in the vicious cycle of sin and the death that brings about guilt and shame.

This is God’s offer to you. Right now.

May I pray for you?

Lord God, I am so tired of the guilt and shame. I’m tired of the endless cycle of attempting to cover myself but only ending up naked and ashamed once again. I have really messed my life up by __________________________ (you fill in the blank) and need a Redeemer, a savior. Would you make me new? I want to experience being made guiltless because of Jesus. Please. I give my life to you and will follow Jesus the rest of my days in gratitude for what you are about to do in me. In Jesus’ name, amen.

If you aren’t ready for that prayer, my I suggest this one?

“Dear God, I’m not certain I can believe all Robin says, or what your Bible says. But I am willing to say, ‘If you are real, and if all this is true, then reveal yourself to me. If you are real, I want to know you and experience all your Bible says. And if you do, I’ll serve you the rest of my days.'”

I’m still praying for you. Love, Robin

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Hope That Won’t Disappoint

Hope That Won’t Disappoint

Are you in a place where hope seems only for someone else?

I have experienced a hope in Jesus Christ that has never disappointed me despite all that I’ve faced.

GOD’S HOPE STORY WITH HUMANITY

A story that began very long ago

In ancient times, most of the known world rejected God. It hadn’t always been that way, but that’s a story for another day. God had created humanity for communion with him, and so invited a people to come out of their chosen idolatries and enter into a relationship with him. He promised to care for, defend, ardently love, and prosper them if they would devote themselves to him as he devoted himself to them. As he had vowed to care for and love them, they vowed to give him their total devotion as well. Yet, over the centuries, although God kept his end of the vow, they did not.

In the Bible, God likened this vow with his people to an intimately loving marriage, and made this agreement with them as a solemn vow, or covenant. Even though God did protect them, provide lavishly for them, and love them with a forever love, they often wanted to be like all the other nations and do as they wished but still reap the benefits of God’s heart toward them and the vow they shared.

God warned them over and over not to reject his love but to return to him. Yet over and over they chose other lovers and then pretended that these lovers had been the providers all God had lavishly given them. Their commitment broken over and over, God eventually gave them over to their lovers, in this case the country of Babylon who battered and cruelly broke them.

God’s heart was that they return to him and to the covenant they once shared, and so, in the middle of their slavery to their lover Babylon, he offered them hope. A certain hope based on his love for them, and his power to affect change once they chose to return to him.

Jeremiah 29:10-11 MSG

As his own people languished in slavery to Babylon seventy years, they remembered what God had done for them, and how he had loved and cared for them. Their hearts warmed, as they envisioned his past mercies. Such memories comforted them as they faced reality. During this time, someone penned the following verses, recorded in the Bible, as God offered them his love and hope in the middle of all they faced.

Lamentations 3:22-23 NLT

Maybe you relate. I know I do.

How you and I fit into God’s hope story

This same God offers each of us the same hope by offering us the same opportunity to return to him. He offers us a plan of restoration, just as he offered his people so long ago. A man named Paul clearly laid out the reality of our choices:

Galatians 6:7-8

The prophet Joel also gives us our remedy:

Joel 2:12 NLT

Maybe you once cried out to God in your pain, yet your requests seemed to vanish into thin air. The God of the universe heard, but is not a Santa Claus who forever gives without expectation. He wants you in all your brokenness. He wants to bring you to himself and offer you all he offered his people so long ago, with the same vow. You don’t need to clean yourself up first. You can’t. But he can clean you up and give you a life you could never have imagined on your own. I know.

I have discovered that what he offers is far and above all I could ever give him. His hope realized is a life of purpose and identity with a love no man can offer.

GOD OFFERS YOU THE SAME HOPE

Let me end this post with a song that beautifully expresses the hope I have found, and the hope God offers you through Jesus. The first lines of the lyrics exclaim:

How great the chasm that lay between us
How high the mountain I could not climb
In desperation, I turned to heaven
And spoke Your name into the night
Then through the darkness, Your loving-kindness
Tore through the shadows of my soul
The work is finished, the end is written
Jesus Christ, my living hope

God’s offer stands. The choice is yours. He’s just waiting for you to decide – go your own way and hope it works well eventually, or go with Jesus and receive a living hope you could never have imagined, despite what goes on around you.

May I pray for you?

Lord, you see and hear the cries of this dear one. You see their desperation. Reveal Jesus to them. Show yourself loving and compassionate beyond their imaginations. Give them they hope they long for, through Jesus Christ, for you are more loving and compassionate than they could ever imagine. In Jesus’ name, amen.

To grow in a new relationship with Jesus, and/or to find help in your pain, click this link for resources

I Just Want To Be Known and Loved

I Just Want To Be Known and Loved

Do you long to be loved because you are known, and not because someone only wants something from you?

Before my first husband passed, one of the last things he said to me was, “I wish we had more time to get to know one another.” We’d been married just over twenty-five years, but to me his words meant the world. We had both loved one another but often spent more time assuming what we knew than sitting down and becoming known.

I just want to be known and loved

Is there anyone who will take the time to really know me?

Too many in the religious world assume we know someone by their surroundings, their actions, or the way they think and respond. For too long I judged the same. I’m grateful Jesus doesn’t. Jesus knows all that’s happened that led you to where you are today. He knows why you think the way you do, and the turmoil that causes you to cry out to really be known and loved, way down deep. Without the judgement.

He remembers all the times you thought love finally arrived only to experience it was just another cheap shot by someone who only wanted to use you.

The story of the woman who had only been known by her failures

There’s a story in the Bible about a woman whom Jesus insisted on meeting, although he knew his fellow Jews, and even his own disciples would frown. She wasn’t even someone her own people wanted to associate with. She felt alone, unknown, and unloved.

The Bible states that Jesus went out of his way to meet this unnamed woman. He knew she’d be at the well, alone, battling the heat. He also knew why she chose this unusual time of day. He waited by the well until after his disciples left to get some lunch as he wanted to speak with her alone. He knew his disciples were discovering who he was and why he came, but also knew they had so far to go. They wouldn’t understand, and so he sat alone, waiting for her to arrive.

She sauntered toward the well wrapped up in her own thoughts. Suddenly she noticed the man sitting quietly and so cautiously walked toward the well, approaching as though she were a deer looking for a trap. She’d never seen this man before, and she could tell by his dress and demeanor that he was a Jew. Jews hated Samaritans, and she didn’t even consider herself an upstanding Samaritan. Yet she had to draw from the well for her day’s needs, so she guessed she’d have to deal with whatever this man dished out.

New Mexico mountain scene

Jesus knew all the details but refused to condemn her

She expected curses and hate-filled words, for even a Jewish man would understand why she was there so late in the day. Yet, his first remarks were kindly asking her for a drink. She instantly shot back, “Why would a Jew ask a Samaritan for anything? We all have no questions about what you Jews think of us Samaritans. Nor do we have better to say about Jews.”

Jesus replied, “If you only knew the gift God has for you and who you are speaking to, you would ask me, and I would give you living water.”

“But sir, you don’t have a rope or a bucket,” she said, “and this well is very deep. Where would you get this living water? And besides, do you think you’re greater than our ancestor Jacob, who gave us this well? How can you offer better water than he and his sons and his animals enjoyed?”

Jesus replied, “Anyone who drinks this water will soon become thirsty again. But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.”

 “Please, sir,” the woman said, “give me this water! Then I’ll never be thirsty again, and I won’t have to come here to get water.”

Jesus then responded in a way that totally caught the woman off-guard.

“Go and get your husband,” Jesus told her.

“I don’t have a husband,” the woman replied.

Jesus said, “You’re right! You don’t have a husband—for you have had five husbands, and you aren’t even married to the man you’re living with now. You certainly spoke the truth!”

Jesus knows you don’t need another religion

Stunned, the woman replied that Jesus must be a prophet, because he knew things no stranger would know. Suddenly she realized that if he was truly a Jewish prophet, he would be able to answer her long-held questions about why there was such a divide between the Jews and Samaritans. Jesus knew her questions were  valid, but chose not to debate with her. His purpose for meeting her wasn’t to hound her to accept the Jewish religion, or to debate whether her religious beliefs were right or wrong. Rather, he wanted to offer her a new way of life not based on certain religious dogma, but upon a relationship with the God who made her and knew her all along.

[Jesus answered] “…God is Spirit, so those who worship him must worship in spirit and in truth.”

The woman said, “I know the Messiah is coming—the one who is called Christ. When he comes, he will explain everything to us.”

Then Jesus told her, I am the Messiah!” [The one whom God promised would come for the purpose of setting captives free.]

The woman was so excited that she left her water jar behind and ran back to the village to tell her fellow Samaritans,

“Come and see a man who told me everything I ever did! Could he possibly be the Messiah?”

New Mexico scene

Jesus knows every battle you’ve fought

I too, like this woman have met Jesus, the one who knows everything I am and loves me anyway. And like this woman, I have also experienced his power to uncover my shame and free me from guilt’s hold by his lavish love. I can without question tell you that Jesus longs to visit you where you are. He’s willing to meet you in your

  • Rejection, and offer you a place in his forever family
  • Loneliness, and fill you with a belonging you have never experienced
  • Questions, and offer you a life you may not yet understand, but a good life beyond your current comprehension
  • Anger, and grant you healing
  • prison cell – whether physical, emotional, or spiritual, and extend to you his key to freedom, without the hangover, the aftermath, or the numbing

He’s not put off by your surroundings, your (fill in the blank), or your past. He’s madly in love with you and offers you a place of standing in his kingdom of light, right now, if you will turn to him and give it all to him. It’s as simple as asking him to give you the power to turn from your current state and make you new. At that very instant, you will become a member of his kingdom, for he turns no one away. Ever.

May I pray for you? Dear Lord, I may not know this one who’s reading, but you do. You know everything about them, and you love them extravagantly. May they in this moment experience your love and power to free them from from their dark place into your amazing light. You are so good and kind, and I ask they would feel your presence right now. Draw them to yourself, as you have a million time drawn me in my pain. I also ask, that if they choose to come to you, that you would lead them to others who’ve experienced your gifts to teach them. Thank you. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Jesus sees everything about you. He's offering you a new life, in a new way, and relationship with him him truth. He's the King and has the power to change things.

Here is a song I recently discovered that may bless you today:

 

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All the quotes above are from John 4:1-28 (NLT)